There are realemergenciesand there are exigency that exist only in people ’s minds . Of the 240 million calls the United States911system handles each year , a staggering amount — more than half in many city — have perfectly nothing to do with life or death [ reservoir : Sampson , National Emergency Number Association ] . Millions of gadget - impair Americans accidentally " prat telephone dial " 911 with their pocketed cell phones . Kids call to complain about their dinner . And highly inebriated multitude call 911 to describe that the moonlight has morphed into a UFO .
Experts carry the problem to worsen as cell phone use of goods and services increase . And " phantom dialing " ( dial accidentally , with your butt or otherwise ) is the worst culprit [ source : Sampson ] . But not the only one . We ’ve scrub the news story and late - night talk show to find the 10 bad reasons people have called 911 . As ridiculous as these calls are , remember child ( and immature adults ) , it ’s a crime to make a nonemergency call to 911 . Abusing the system can get amercement and even jail time . Or worse , you end up in a leaning like this one .
10: They Think They’re Dead
A serial publication of piteous decision led Michigan police officer Edward Sanchez to call 911 in April 2006 to cover that he and his married woman were " idle . "
Sanchez eventually cool down out enough to make his first smart determination of the 24-hour interval ( mayhap the 10 ): He resigned from thepolice forceto keep off prosecution [ origin : Time ] .
9: Their Phone Hates Them
If you take one lesson from this clause , have it be this : mesh your keypad ! A disgraceful number of flub stealer anddrug dealershave accidentally dialed 911 while openly hash out their late or ongoing deplorable conduct .
In July 2013 , 911 dispatchers in Oklahoma picked up what appeared to be a dropped call . Then they overhear muffled voices saying not - wary - at - all stuff like , " I did n’t get through half the star sign , " and " We ’re good . I got enough jewelry . We ’re effective . " pig picked up the brainiac outlaw trying to pawn the steal booty [ generator : Maune ] .
Earlier the same year , 911 dispatchers in Fresno , Calif. , were dumbfounded to overhear a conversation between two dudes as they hatched a half - bake architectural plan to erupt into a car ; proceeded tobreak into said automobile ; and announced loud that they had found prescription drugs . ( " They ’re Norcos , yeee - ahhh ! " ) They then sped away [ source : Burton ] . The dispatcher continued to heed in — titter , we assume — as the cops pulled the suspects over and arrested them .
8: Their Lunch Sucks
A perturbing amount of Americans have jumble 911 with some kind ofsandwichSWAT team , call in the police to solve their drive - through " offence . "
There was the guy in Connecticut who cry 911 complaining that he had " specifically asked for little Republic of Turkey and little ham , a bunch of high mallow and a lot of mayonnaise " and needed the full personnel of the jurisprudence to situate his deli ordering [ source : AP ] . A Florida man called 911 with a similar " special sauce " emergency , then bid back when police had n’t responded chop-chop enough [ source : Reader ’s Digest ] .
And then there ’s Raibin Osman , the unfortunate Oregon man who had to explicate to his cellmates at county jail why he was spending the night in prison : AMcDonald’semployee had forget to include an orangish juice with his drive - through rescript . When he alerted authorities to the miss succus malicious gossip , they informed him that he was abusing the 911 scheme , and when he refused to calm down , they arrested him [ source : KATU News ] .
7: She Has a Love Emergency
In 2006 , Lorna Dudash of Aloha , Ore. , mistook911for a dial - a - fuzz dating service of process . Apparently , a twosome of police officers had knock on her door and kindly asked her to turn down her music . After they left , Dudash call 911 and had this bewitching rally with the dispatcher :
Dispatcher : " 9 - 1 - 1 . Do you need fire , medical or law ? "
Dudash : " No dame , I do n’t . I do n’t have an hand brake . Two law officers just left my house just now …. Would you send them back my way ? "
Dispatcher : " You need them to come back there ? "
Dudash : " Ooh , I ’d like that , yeah . "
Dispatcher : " Why do you need them to fare back there ? "
Dudash : " Because I have an exigency … I ’ll think of something . "
It was n’t long before Dudash dropped the charade and begin " veridical " with the femaledispatcher .
Dudash : " Honey , I ’m just going to be fair with you , OK ? I just conceive he was cute . I ’m 45 years older and I ’d like to meet him again , but I do n’t know how to go about doing that without call 9 - 1 - 1 . I experience this is absolutely in no agency , shape or form an emergency . "
The ruggedly openhanded law officers were more than well-chosen to return … to arrest Dudash for misusing 911 . countenance ’s hope she at least get their name this time . It ’ll make a great account at their hymeneals , or her restraining rescript hearing [ source : Crezo ] .
6: He’s Lazy (and Slightly Crazy)
Some people will go to enceinte length to annul leave the family for a fresh large number of butt . In 2010 , a slightly unhinged Canadian man made repeated calls to 911 ( Canadians expend that number too ) require with increasing excitement that the police help oneself get the Winnipeg Jets professionalhockeyteam to regress from NHL exile in Atlanta . To his cite , ice ice hockey in Georgia makes as much sense as beach volleyball in Saskatchewan .
After 911 starter warned him ( politely , of grade — they ’re Canadian ) that another call would land him in jail , the man welcomed a sojourn from theRoyal Canadian Mounted Police , append , " If you ’re coming to get me , can you add me some smokes?"[source : McIntyre ] .
5: They Want a New Family
Again , there ’s a lot of confusion about what characterize as a licit reason to call 911 . Some sept — many of them drunk — believe that the police should function as society ’s " parents , " swoop up in with sirens blaring to settle petty disputes between tiff mate and creak develop children .
" Mom took my beer away . " That was the master complaint of a verydrunk32 - year - honest-to-goodness Florida man who want his female parent arrested for … what , exactly ? shaver ill-usage ? [ author : Harwell ] .
In a similar vein , a Texas woman named Elsa Benson visit 911 allege that her husband " did not desire to eat his supper . " Granted , the woman was a serial911 abuserwho had call 30 times in six months for non - emergency reasons , include when she could n’t obtain her favourite shirt . Benson was pick up and appoint with 911 abuse [ source : New ] .
4: She Forgot How a Car Door Works
Sure , it ’s easy to make fun of someone who calls 911 when they lock themselves in their own car , but put yourself in this woman ’s shoes . First of all , you live in Florida , which seems to be the generator of 90 to 98 per centum of all absurd 911 phone claim . Plus , it ’s hot and muggy all the sentence . So when you find yourself baby-sit in a Walgreen ’s parking lot , suddenly unable to unfold the gondola door with the normal switchee thingee , you might start to panic .
You ’re sweating , the auto wo n’t begin and the windows do n’t tramp down . In a convulsion of Sunshine State insanity , you do the only matter that derive to mind : you call 911 . Only after the dispatcher calmly propose you to manuallyunlock the door — with just a hint of disbelief in her spokesperson — do you actualise what an idiot you have been [ origin : Crezo ] .
3: At Least He Has a Good Excuse – He’s 4
Kids say the goddam things … even to 911 operators . A4 - year - oldboy was catch on tape ask an unusually patient hand brake dispatcher for help with some mathematics problems [ author : MSN , YouTube ] . The operator walk him through some " takeout food " before his mom identify the game .
" What did I tell you about bet on the sound ? " mamma screams in the background .
" If I need help , call somebody , " replies the fry ( mock ) innocently .
" I did n’t stand for the police ! "
2: Justin Bieber Has Broken Into His House
A Washington man descend home from work one night to a disturbing sight — a strange young man in a black hoodie stand eerily still in his support room . freak out , the man called 911 .
" Ma’am , I ’m just standing in my route out in front . I walked to my house . I unlocked the door , and this Thomas Kid is just standing in my living way star at me , " he report shakily . " He ’s got his hand up on his hood . Like he ’s got a hoodie on and he literally has not move a lick " [ reference : Tonight Show With Jay Leno ]
When the fuzz arrived , pistols drawn , one of them recognized the torpid interloper as none other than mega pop mavin Justin Bieber . Or rather , a life - size composition board cutout of mega pop star Justin Bieber . The humanity ’s adolescent girl was playing a little frivolity . A very successful one !
1: She Reported on Herself
A Wisconsin char called 911 from her auto to report a dangerous driver , a dead fairish reason to dial the cops .
" Somebody ’s really inebriated drive down Granton Road , " she reported .
" Are you behind them ? " the dispatcher ask .
" No , " she said . " I am them . "
Huh , that ’s a crafty one . It seems that 49 - yr - old Mary Strey had overestimated her sombreness when she hopped behind the bike after a long night of brandy and Cokes at the local tavern [ source : Time ] . Sure , she could have pulled over and called a cab when she agnize the blurred reality of the post , but apparently she felt the need to instruct herself a example . If only more felons were more forthcoming .
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Having listened to dozens of recordings of material 911 calls for this article , I ’ve fare to the ending that being a 911 dispatcher is either the most thwarting or most entertaining job in the earth . for certain , you have to answer hundreds of incorrect number and grumble people who call for guidance or need a ride to the liquor store , but you also get to field calls from an endless stream of uproarious nut . Even better , every call is recorded , so you might even finish up on internal tv set ask a man if his mess up Burger King order is really a sprightliness or death hand brake . If this authorship affair does n’t work out , I ’m in spades applying to become a starter . I wonder what their policy is on openly mocking callers …. On 2nd thought , I should probably keep my day task .