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Are you quick for the best Putin jokes and meme ?

At time of writing , Putin made the super inauspicious decision to test to intrude on Ukraine . Unfortunately , it appears that he succeeded in brainwash his the great unwashed into thinking this was a effective conclusion ( source : Washington Post : 58 % of Russians support the war ) . However , the position on the ground show that Ukraine is resisting beyond Putin ’s expectations , to the satisfaction of ( almost ) the entire world .

header for best Putin jokes

Credit:WeAreTheMighty.com

The Best Putin Jokes and Memes about the Russian War in Ukraine

Vladimir Putin scheduled a physic reading . “How long will I live ? ” he asked . “I see distinctly you will last for years but you will die , uhhh , well , you will die on a Ukrainian vacation . ”“Which one ? ” he asked , eager to know the exact escort . “Any day you die will be a Ukrainian vacation . ”

Putin listen that many Russian soldiers are getting sick in Ukraine , so he sends a health inspector to join the Russian ground forces to improve its sanitary condition . The inspector involve a general:“How do you machinate drink water?”“First , we filter it . Then we boil it . ”“And after that?”“Well … just to be cautious , we just drink vodka . ”

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header for best Putin jokes

spill the beans about vodka , there has been a slender rebranding of the Absolut Vodka bottle :

Most multitude around the world make fun of Putin ’s USA and its unfitness to defeat Ukraine ’s troops :

The Russian army ’s subordination of weapons and camouflage vehicle is indeed not the good , as exhibit on the two examples below :

putin dictator joke with north korean dictator

How many Russian soldiers does it take to take Kyiv?You do n’t know?It ’s ok . Even Putin has n’t figured it out yet .

What ’s Putin ’s with child accomplishment ? He has succeeded in turning the Russian army ( ego - extol second sound regular army in the public ) into … the second best army in Ukraine .

The @ukraine chirrup score partake in this drawing ( Source ) . We added our own text :

putin dictator joke with north korean dictator

Well … for one thing , the Ruble is in trouble . What ’s the difference of opinion between a one dollar bill and a ruble now?About one dollar … 🙂

Russians are trying to withdraw their money from the bank

As a result of the war in Ukraine and the international response , the Russian rouble is losing value tight , and Russians as starting to resent Putin ’s actions . Here is a good Putin gag about this :

A military personnel is hold back in communication channel for several hour at his local depository financial institution to seek to call back his money . He loses patience , and , furiously , ends up scream “ This was a stupid state of war . I ’m going to go and belt down Putin because he ’s done all of this . ”

He perish to the Kremlin , fuming .

absolut putin joke

A few bit later , he is back in line at the banking concern .

“ Hey you came back ” pronounce another somebody waiting in blood “ what happened ? ”

“ The line at the Kremlin is even longer than this one … ”

absolut putin joke

The Joke about Stalin Visiting Putin:

While Putin is work in his business office contrive the Ukraine war , the ghost of Stalin short come along . Putin take the chance to search advice : “ Stalin , what befall ? why are things not ferment out for us?”Stalin gives him advice : “ air 5 million Russians to their death at war , and paint the Kremlin amobarbital sodium . ”“Why low-spirited ? ” asks Vladimir Putin . “ … I have it off you would n’t have a problem with the first part , ” chortle the old Stalin .

Joe Biden Calls Putin:

Biden calls Putin to discuss the latest berth . He share with Putin : “ I had an interesting dream – I saw Moscow , full of light , delight , dance and laughter , with people drive sumptuosity cars – just like it was before all these warfare warrant . There were Ne lights and billboard all over the city ! ”

At this gunpoint , Putin asks : “ And what did these billboards say ? ”

Biden responds : “ How the inferno would I cognise … I do n’t speak Ukrainian . ”

russian army joke

Credit:WeAreTheMighty.com

Riots in the street

hoi polloi are rioting in the street in Russia , and a man shouts,“The President is an idiot!”A police officer runs up to him and says , “ It ’s illegal to insult President Putin . ”“I was n’t speak about him , ” protest the rioter . “Yes , you were . We all know who the imbecile is ” the officer say .

Putin Suffered a Heart Attack During the Ukraine War:

He went into a coma for several geezerhood :

Unfortunately , the UN could have shown more funding to the people of Ukraine :

“ 65 % of people in the United States are not able to settle Ukraine on a map . They are really onward of their fourth dimension . ”

russian army joke

Putin, Zelensky and Biden are all in a hot air balloon

Unfortunately , the balloon is come out to miss altitude fast and all 3 realize that they need to lose weightiness . Putin throw out a bottle of vodka : “ We have too much vodka in Russia anyway . ”

Biden throws out an AK-47 and say “ We have too many artillery in the United States anyway . ”

Zelensky project out Putin and says “ We have too much of that in Ukraine anyway . ” But the balloon crashes anyway due to the massive free weight of Zelensky ’s balls .

putin’s secret army joke

( Alternative put-on :   Ukraine has drop off its biggest combat ship . Zelensky visited them and go down the ship because of the weight of his monolithic Lucille Ball . ” )

Putin’s Political Jokes

Putin wish to send his political opponents , dissidents , and in the main the great unwashed that bother him , to the goulag , or to their graves :

Putin also seems to be an emotion - less dictator . Who has the best smile on the picture below ?

A Chief Executive with emotion … well . Almost .

putin’s secret army joke

Or check out this meme with a firedog that looks like Putin :

“ you may knock Putin as much as you want … But very few people are actually able to run two countries at once ”

When Russia announced it had bring in a new vaccinum … which no one was really uncoerced to take .

vladimir putin and adolf meme

take in more Putin memes with our page featuringTop 20 Most - Upvoted Putin Memes .

2 Embarrassing & Funny Videos that Putin Does Not Want You to See

Yes , both videos show events that did bump :

During an exhibition hockey game game in Sochi , Putin get off on a mat and fell over as he try on to make out a tour of duty of the annulus to wave at the crowd . That ’s not dictator material ! The game featured “ legends ” such as Slava Fetisov , a ice hockey ace . take in the television :

We almost feel bad for Vladimir Putin after watch this agile 30 - second video – Watch Vlad “ drop dead Inside ” so many times :

vladimir putin and adolf meme

World Leaders Do Not Always Trust Putin (Two Versions)

World leaders do n’t always hope Putin when offered Russian teatime . variant 1 :

reading 2 :

The Best Text Jokes about Putin & Russia

Some of the good Putin Jokes are simple short textbook jokes :

What’s the difference between Putin and Hitler?

Hitler know when to kill himself .

( Although one could argue both should have done it a few years sooner … )

Obama Jokes about Putin at White House Press Dinner

This dates back to 2014 , but showcases several interesting Putin laugh by former President Barack Obama himself .

Finally, Some Russians Keep a Great Sense of Humor

Some manage to keep a good signified of humor despite the whole situation :

The media are also not talking enough about this : the PutinDeez Nuts joke .

More Jokes

ruble value chart

ruble value chart

Article image

(Hryvnias is the Ukrainian currency). Credit:Svarec.

Article image

air support in ukraine joke

Credit:@punhubonline

air support in ukraine joke

putin joke about wanting peace

putin joke about wanting peace

urkaine biggest import meme

urkaine biggest import meme

putin meme in bus with person kicking backseat

putin meme in bus with person kicking backseat

putin opponent joke

putin opponent joke

putin and two girls meme

putin and two girls meme

happy, sad and angry presidents

Credit:KnowYourMeme

happy, sad and angry presidents

dog that looks like vladimir putin

Credit:ViralViralVideos

dog that looks like vladimir putin

putin meme about a woman being russian president

putin meme about a woman being russian president

putin joke about russian vaccine

putin joke about russian vaccine

putin tea joke (1)

putin tea joke (1)

putin tea jokes (2)

putin tea jokes (2)

Putin deez nuts jokes

Putin deez nuts jokes

squirrel holding 2 nuts cartoon

squirrel holding 2 nuts cartoon

group of 3 people making fun of something

group of 3 people making fun of something

funny picture showing a group of bald people following a man with a full set of hair

funny picture showing a group of bald people following a man with a full set of hair

collage of 9 funny and dirty memes

collage of 9 funny and dirty memes

funny photo with a proctoligist getting ready for a colonoscopy exam

funny photo with a proctoligist getting ready for a colonoscopy exam

dad laughing

dad laughing

person measuring their waist

person measuring their waist

pictures of a priest with a cross

pictures of a priest with a cross

Casual business team laughing during meeting in the office

Casual business team laughing during meeting in the office

group of mexicans in front of the mexico flag

group of mexicans in front of the mexico flag

dad laughing

dad laughing

man reading a black book and looking offended

man reading a black book and looking offended

couple of adults laughing

couple of adults laughing

header image showing 2 adult women laughing

header image showing 2 adult women laughing

ligma header image

ligma header image

duck showing a list of jokes

duck showing a list of jokes

we love mexico banner

we love mexico banner

surprised couple on a couch reading their computer

surprised couple on a couch reading their computer

woman licking lip

woman licking lip

we love india message with jokes

we love india message with jokes