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Please take concern because this page is meant for grownup . You must be at least 18 twelvemonth old ( and no , hotdog years do n’t reckon ) . We take no obligation for corrupt the minds of child . That ’s a parent ’s caper .
We ’ve put together an incredible collection of jape and memes sure to elicit amusing reactions with adults . Yes , several lines may have been crossed and obscenity laws violate so consider yourself duly discourage . If you ’re looking for something lite , then you well get off the scale . Some of these jest are rated AAA and a few of our author have been hauled off for what they have done .
you could employ the links below to jump to the type of jokes you want , or but keep scrolling down .
First part: Top 25 clean jokes for adults… because you can be funny without being naughty
** Great joke for adults: the wife that missed the super bowl (30 seconds) **
A man finds his tail end at the Super Bowl , but point out that there ’s an empty seat between himself and the next guy . “ Who in their correct mind would escape the Super Bowl ? ! ” The humankind next to him smiling and say , “ Well , actually this was my wife ’s seat . She pass on away recently , and we had already buy the tickets . ”The first guy rope reply , “ Oh , I ’m sorry for your deprivation , ” but then think for a s and adds , “ Do n’t you retrieve it would have been nice to take one of her family members to the game?”The human beings looks ahead and response , “ I would , but they are all at her funeral decently now . ” * * *
** Funny short jokes **
My Padre always used to say , “ In life , one door might fill up , but another one will open . ” He was a great philosopher . But an fearsome cabinet builder .
- Sometimes you get a bad report just because of your job . It ’s not always comely : 90 % of lawyers give the other 10 % a bad reputation .
- wild , a gentleman’s gentleman sits down at a Browning automatic rifle and tell a drink . He mutters “ These lawyer are jerks … all the same … ” . Sitting not too far , a human beings in a suit responds “ Hey , catch your lip . ”“Why , you ’re a lawyer?”The valet de chambre responds : “ No , I ’m a jerk . ”
Jump head to these antic :
** Great joke for adults: mom is pregnant (30 seconds) **
A few days before Christmas , a mammy calls her girl : “ Hey , I know this might add up as a jar , but I ’m pregnant . ”“How could this happen ? ” the girl responds , dismayed . “ You ’re 46 ! Oh my god , this is frightful . ”“It was an accident , ” the mom says . “ Please just call your sister and recite her . Have to go ! ”
The girl frantically calls her baby who immediately calls her mom : “ The two of us are fly home right on aside . I ’m book the flight now . This is unbelievable ! ” She hang up the telephone . The mommy pops a bottle of wine , pours two glasses , and turn to her married man : “ Honey , the kids are get home for Christmas . And they are paying for their own plane tickets . ” * * *
An Englishman , a Scot , and an Irishman walk into a saloon with their wives and all monastic order tea . The Englishman sweetly asks his married woman , “ Pass the honey , dear . ”Inspired , the Scotsman turn to his married woman articulate , “ Pass the bread , sugar . ”Not to be outdone , the Irishman glances at his wife and bark , “ Pass the Milk River , you bally moo-cow ! ” * * *
I demand the director of a psychiatric ward how they know for trusted if someone is mentally unstable and postulate to be consecrate . He explain their method acting : they go to a lav and fill a bathtub to the top . They then give the patient a big bucket and a small spoon , and ask them to empty the tub . “ Ah , ” I replied , “ so the normal person chooses the boastful bucket because it ’s larger , correct ? ” The manager disagree : “ No , a normal individual would only pull the drain plug . ” And lend “ By the way , is a room with a garden aspect ok for you ? ”
- A Polish immigrant goes to the optician for an heart exam . The optician pointed to a board with the letters : C Z W I X N O sec metric ton A 100 Z“Can you show this ? ” the lens maker involve . “Read this ? ! ” the Polish man respond , “ I work with this hombre ! ”
- A man arrive at the bar , ostensibly very confused after a terrible day . He orders an expensive liquor nip and downs it right aside . “ One more!”The bartender serves him again , and again the homo bolt down the shot properly off . “ One more!”After five shots , the man reveals : “ If you had what I had , you ’d be drinking this fast too” . Worried , the mixologist asks what the serviceman has . The man respond “ I ’m broke , I only have $ 2 … ”
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*** Great joke for adults: old man at the bar (40 seconds) ***
An old man at a bar gainsay the bartender with a $ 20 stakes , exact he can bite his own eye . fascinate , the barkeep accepts . The gentleman take his looking glass heart and gently gnaw on it , acquire the bet . The bartender , a bit annoyed , pays up .
About 10 transactions later , the piece returns with a large bet : he bets $ 100 that he can urinate straight into a shot meth while running around it . Convinced that it ’s impossible , the bartender sky-high accepts .
The man tries but splashes pee all around , missing the barb glass wholly . Triumphantly , the bartender celebrates his victory . But a man of a sudden squall angrily , “ Damn it ! ” When asked about his thwarting , he groans , “ That guy just depend me $ 200 that he could urinate all over the bar and you ’d be thrilled about it . ”
*** Biden is now invisible (45 seconds) ***
Joe Biden walks into a bar , but he is mysteriously inconspicuous . The bartender get a line him and take : “ Joe , I can get wind you , but why ca n’t I see you ? ” Biden set about , “ You see , I found a stale oil lamp in my basement . course , I dusted it off , and a genie appeared to allot me 3 wishes . ”
“ For my first wish , I said , ‘ I want a very smart , ambitious and friendly wife . ” But then the genie hand me Jill , and I realized i forgot to delineate that i also want my married woman to be younger and forever attractive .
“ For my second regard , I said ‘ I want to serve as the President of the United States . ’ Lo and behold , that regard was action as well . ” However , as shortly as I started the line of work , pomposity started to skyrocket and Russia attack Ukraine . I realise i draw a blank to specify that I require to be Chief Executive in a successful and trouble - free world . ”“Finally , ” Biden said with a grin . “ For my third regard , I begin with : Let me be clear … “ * * *
A customer walk into a coffee shop and ask the barista for the wifi password . “You need to buy coffee berry first , ” the barista says . “Okay , I ’ll have an espresso , ” the customer tell . After bear , the customer asks , “ Can I have the password now?”The barista replies , “ Of course ! It ’s ‘ youneedtobuycoffeefirst ’ . All lowercase , no spaces . ”
Related jokes : the best dirty pop jokesormore clean joke for adults
- A Kindergarten course of instruction started a lesson on descriptive words . The instructor asked the students to use the word “ great ” twice in a conviction : – The first scholarly person enounce , “ I had a big time on my great vacation . ” – The second student said , “ There are so many groovy things about this great class . ” – The third student said , “ Oh ! My daddy does this all the sentence . He sound out ‘ That ’s great , just f * * * * great . ”
***The Ford Explorer and the Maserati (1 minute) **
Two buddies were boasting about their unexampled ride . One guy had a Ford Explorer while the other flaunted a luxurious Maserati . “ This car ’s amazing , ” the Maserati owner brag . “ It ’s got a build - in cooler and TV ! ” Not to be surmount , the Explorer owner chimed in , “ Those are neat features , but hazard what ? I ’ve impart a cooler and TV to my Explorer too . And it ’s four times cheaper than your Maserati ! ”
Unwilling to grant frustration , the Maserati owner raise the bet : “ Well , in my Maserati , you may even fold down the backseat and have a comfortable bed . ” The Explorer proprietor rejoin , “ I can do that too ! Plus , I keep an inflatable mattress in my trunk , just in casing . ” Furious , the Maserati driver hasten to the franchise and need them to fit out the car with the fanciest upgrades .
A couple of Clarence Shepard Day Jr. later , he drive to his champion ’s family and stops on his friend ’s drive but notices that the windows of the Ford Explorer are all fog up . He knocks on the car window and says , “ come check out my novel electronics ” . The Ford Explorer owner tardily opens the window and gives his friend a unearthly look “ Really , you are asking me to get out of my hot tub to moderate out your car ? ? ”
** The wife at the pharmacist (30 seconds) **
A lady locomote to the pharmacy and involve for the psyche pharmacist : “ I take something to poison my husband . ” Shocked , the pharmacists ask , “ What ? Why would you say that ? You should leave now , or I have no alternative but to call the law . ”
The lady reaches for her phone and shows the pharmacist a few compromise text messages between her husband and the apothecary ’s married woman . You see , I ’m no-count to say but my husband cheated on me with your wife . ”“Oh well that ’s different , ” the pharmacist says . “ I did not cognise that you had a prescription . ”
link post : say the50 well sporty jokes for adult .
Second part: top 20 dirty jokes for adults
Is your psyche clean ? Not for long ! Things are about to get pretty dirty !
My friend got his medical licence revoked . All of this is just because she slumber with a affected role … It ’s unfortunate because she was a great veterinary .
What do you get when you jingle Santa ’s ball ? A white Christmas !
- Great joke for adults : whales at sea***A manlike whale and a female heavyweight see a sportfishing boat – the male heavyweight recognise the ship that catch his dad whale a year ago . He need the female whale “ have ’s both get under the boat , bluster line out of our air holes , and it might tumble the ship . ” They go ahead and do it , with success : the fish gravy boat sinks . However , the Jack-tar from the boat manage to float away , almost reaching the shore . The manly whale , disappointed that they might get away , suggests “ Let ’s see and wipe out them . ”But this meter , the distaff whale does n’t want to join in : “ take care , I did the blow caper just like you asked , but I really do n’t desire to swallow the mariner ” . * * *
Wife asks her husband : “ How many fair sex have you ever slept with?”Husband react : “ One , two , three , four , you , five , six … six total ”
** Great joke for adults: penguin’s car problems🐧**
A penguin have his railway car to the shop , and resolve to get an ice cream while the car is getting repaired . Because he has to apply his flipper to hold the spoon , he is having a hard sentence eating and end up covered with melt ice pick . When return to the shop , the mechanic looks at him and suppose , “ It looks like you suck a seal . ” The penguin answer , “ No , it is just chicken feed cream ! ” * * *
What ’s the process of applying for a occupation at Hooters ? They just give you a bra and say , “ Here , make full this out . ”
What ’s the difference between your pen*s and a fillip check ? Someone ’s always unforced to blow your incentive .
What ’s the difference between hungry and horny ? Where you stick the Cucumis sativus .
** Great joke for adults: a man one hole behind **
A human was play on a new golf game form and mislay cartroad of what hole he was on . He asked a lady play forward of him . She responded : “ I ’m on the 7th kettle of fish and you ’re one hole behind me , so you must be on the 6th . ”
Later , the same thing find , and he asked the lady again . She respond : “ I ’m on the 14th and you ’re a gob behind me , so you must be on the 13th . ”
After finishing the course , he saw the lady sit at the clubhouse . They end up chitchat and discuss work . She said she was in sale and he asked what she sell . “I’m scared you ’ll express mirth , ” she hesitated , but the man promised he would NOT laugh . “I betray tampons ” , she said . The Isle of Man burst into laughter . “See ! ” she yelled . He respond ” No it ’s not that ! I ’m a can newspaper salesman , so I ’m STILL one trap behind you ! ”
What does the receptionist at a spermatozoon bank say as client leave ? “ Please amount again ”
- The previous the Smarter * * * An old couple in their 70s chat a s*x therapist . The man asked if she could watch them have intercourse , and she agree . later on , the therapist said everything was normal and the couple was really doing heavy consider their old age . The twain seems glad and farewell after the piece devote his $ 80 carbon monoxide - salary . astonishingly , the couple return every Wednesday for six weeks , replicate the routine . Puzzled , the therapist eventually require why . The old serviceman explain , “ Well , you see , we ca n’t do it at my place because my married woman is there , and we ca n’t do it at her office because her husband is there . And even the cheapest hotel shoot $ 130 a Nox . But my Centennial State - pay here is only $ 80 . ”
** Great joke: the 3 teachers (45 seconds) **
A boy evidence his don that his gymnasium teacher wants to meet with him . “What’d you do ? ” the dad asks . “He said I was shoot for for kid ’s heads during dodgeball , ” the boy explains . “Well did you win?”“Yes , I did”“That ’s my boy . I ’ll spill the beans to your gym instructor soon , ” the dad decide .
The next twenty-four hours , the boy says his band teacher want to see him . “Why ’s that ? ” he allege . “She say to play louder , so I act as loud as I could . ”The father laughs , “ Well you did what she call for . I ’ll drop by before long to talk to him . ”
Two mean solar day later , the don says he is pop off to school to foregather the teachers . The boy let in : “ Well you do n’t have to go now , I got kick out today . ”Confused , the father asks why . “I got called to the principal ’s federal agency , and there was my gymnasium teacher , band instructor , and art teacher there . ” “ What the f*ck was the fine art teacher doing there ? ” query the founder . “That ’s on the nose what I said ! ”
Two h00kers are ready to start their night . One of them smiles and say , “ I can already tell this is gon na be a great night , I can sense d1ck in the air!”The other one looks at her and order , “ No , no , I just burped . ”
What ’s the remainder between a distaff erogenous zone and cable car keys ? Men can really find their car keys .
** Great joke for adults: The nun in a taxi 🧕🚕**
A cab driver picks up a nun and hesitatingly asks her a question , dread it might hurt her . The conical buoy reassure him , tell she ’s find out it all . He confess : “ Well … I have always had a fantasy of receiving 0r@l from a nun . ” . The conical buoy , a bit surprised but calm , responds “ that is fine , my son . I can help , but only if you are not married ” .
The driver responds quickly : “ that ’s not a job , I am not marital ! ” . They intercept , and she fulfills his phantasy . However , when they start drive again , the gadget driver admits : “ I ’m sorry but I have rest to you , I ’m married . ” The nun answer “ That ’s all right , my boy . I have n’t been very honest with you either : my name is in reality Freddie , and I ’m go to a Halloween company . ”
Why are vegan woman splendid at apply he@d ? Because they are used to eating nuts .
*** Great joke for adults: the hospital visit (30 seconds) ***
A wealthy fiscal backer of a hospital goes on a tour with the director , and ca n’t help but notice a patient mastrbting . She is shocked , but the director explain “ This man suffers from Semenitis , a rare medical condition where his test*cles fill up too chop-chop . ” The woman sound out “ I hypothecate it is ok then ” .
Continuing their visit , they now take the air past a way where a patient meet or@l from a nurse . aghast again , the charwoman asks , “ And why is THIS come about in your hospital ? ? ” The director calmly respond “ Same term . The patient just has a serious healthcare design . ”
Three pregnant cleaning lady chat during a birthing class : a blonde , a brunet , and a redhead . The brunette supposition , “ I ’ll have a son because my married man was on top . ” The redhead tote up , “ I ’ll probably have a girl since I was on top . ” Confused , the blonde say “ Well , I guess I ’ll have a pup then … ”
View moredirty jest to partake with human being , ordirty jokes to portion out with womenor our compilation ofbest contaminating jokes of all - time .
Top 20 edgy jokes for adults
These joke will blow your head . They better because we ’re not blow anything else of yours !
Prince Andrew come home one day and finds his girlfriend packing up all her personal belongings in a baggage . She tell apart him that she ’s leaving because people say he is just a ped0phile … With a look of defence and unbelief , Prince Andrew steps back and says “ await , look … that ’s a big Holy Scripture to use for a 14 - year - erstwhile ! ”
What ’s the most the stupid animal in the jungle?A polar bear .
Why are orphans unremarkably bad at dodgeball ? Because almost no one ever escape them .
This orphan was able to travel all around the world for a full yr . He just never became homesick .
My wife said she ’d slam my oral sex on the keyboard if I do n’t quit writing dumb laugh . I ’m not too worried , though , I lie with she ’s just sd987gfdh sdf097fds s9072 oihsiho[hoi .
What is the scientific / medical name for Viagra?Mycoxaflopin
Just found out the guy who steal my journal died in a auto fortuity . My thought are with his family .
What takes 4 parking spots ? 2 women parking their car .
If she is strong , rich , and keeps you up all night , she is … a cup of coffee .
medico calling with bad newsDoc : “ Hi – I am sad but I have bad news , and I have very regretful news show . Which one do you desire first?”Patient : “ ok , give me the very bad tidings first”Doc “ We have received the latest test results and you have been diagnose withLigma . You only have 1 day to live”Patient : “ Just 1 day ? ! … what ’s the bad newsworthiness then???”Doc : “ I adjudicate to call you yesterday , but you did n’t pick up your speech sound ”
What is the tea that has the bad taste?Reali - tea .
View morehilariously daddy jokesoroffensive jokes for adults .
Dad jokes for adults
Just because you now watch more sketch than p*rn , it does n’t imply that you ’ve lost your mother wit of grownup mood . match out how these pop jokes keep the humor at an adult stratum .
What does a man on a one - night point of view and a snowstorm have in common?You do n’t love how many inches you ’ll get and how long it will last .
Chicken eggs are a work of perfection . Why ? Because they get put down and do n’t even need a c0ck .
My phone keeps autocorrecting “ fvck ” to “ duck’s egg . ” That ’s okay – it ’s still fowl language .
I could n’t think that my pop and mommy disassociate . My pa always described their married couple as : “ Being just like Christmas . ” afterward , I learned he meant it ’s because Christmas only comes once a class .
A cannibal family eats dinner together . But the Logos , visibly upset and not interested in the food , refuses to corrode . The cannibal dad says : “ Your mother cooked very long and her heart and soul is in this meal . I expect you to wipe out it . ”
I asked my married woman to tell me something to make me both felicitous and angry : My married woman say that my c0ck was slightly expectant than my father ’s .
A woman walks around her house whole naked when suddenly she hears the doorbell ring . She take “ Who is this ? ” A man answers “ It ’s the unreasoning man” . Re - assured , the woman , still defenseless , give the door . The man stares at her , hesitates for a indorsement , then suppose “ ok … so where do you need me to instal those screen ? ”
My beau asked me ‘ Is cutting the crust off of bread like circumcision for a sandwich ? ’ I tell ‘ No , cutting off the incrustation does n’t get rid of the cheese .
A cleaning woman becharm her married man with another woman in bottom and get angry . He hurriedly explicate , arrogate he was just helping the girl . He say : “ The girl was hitchhike but did n’t know her congenator ’ address , so I study her home to correspond an onetime phonebook . When we got here , I saw her shirt was wear out , so I give way her a skillful t - shirt you had n’t worn in long time . Her shoes were diminish asunder too , so I gave her one of your pairs that had been sitting unused for three years . ” She thanked me profusely and then jokingly asked , “ Is there anything else in this theater your wife never uses ? ”
View moredirty dad jokesfor adults .
Top 10-15 knock-knock jokes for adults
love the espouse whack - knock jokes which are PG denounce if the PG stands for Pretty Gross !
Knock , knock . Who ’s there?Amanda . Amanda who?Amanda lay you when your man ’s not house .
Knock , knock . Who ’s there?Dozer . Dozer who?Dozer two of the biggest dumbbell I ’ve seen !
Knock , smash . Who ’s there?Figs . Figs who?Figs the dang doorbell , I ’m tired of pink !
Knock , knock . Who ’s there?Kenny StrokKenny who?Kenny Strok - it now or will he wait ’ til afterward ?
Knock , knock . Who ’s there?Baghdad . Baghdad who?Baghdad a * * up over here , girl .
Knock , knock . Who ’s there?Nana . Nana who?Nana your bizzness ! open up the door .
Knock , knock . Who ’s there?Hatch . hatching who?Gesundheit !
Knock , knock . Who ’s there?PhilPhil who?Phil Deez Nuts
Knock , whang . Who ’s there?Hugh . Hugh who?Hugh Jass , just your eccentric .
Knock , knock . Who ’s there?Idaho . Idaho who?Wow , you da ho , too ? !
Knock , rap . Who ’s there?Yo mama . Yo mama who?Yo mama ’s at my place in my bed , if you were wondering .
View the intact list ofknock - whang jokes for adult .
Top 10 kinky memes for adults to keep your mind entertained
Some say that kink is in the eye of the observer , well lay eyes on these meme and get your twist on !
take in all ourkinky meme .
Top 20 messed-up jokes that are just weird but really funny
Are you still with us ? Enjoy the follow mussy jokes that put the “ 500 ” in disfunction . Those jokes are definitely for adults only .
Finding Nemo prompt me of my dad ! I ca n’t find him either !
My grief counselor become flat . He was so good , that I do n’t even handle .
Why do men clamber to work riddles after shoot a Viagra pill ? Because they just keep acquire hard .
I started crying when papa was cutting onions . onion plant was my favorite pet cat .
What made Mrs. Claus file for divorce ? Santa would only come once a twelvemonth .
My grandparent hate technology . That ’s when I decided to disconnect grandma ’s life support machine to make my stop .
What did the Chinese man call his baby washables serving ? Ho Lee ’s flat solid .
What is the main difference between a remote control and a GB - spot ? My boyfriend will make his in effect effort to search for the remote .
How can you know when the dishwasher has stopped crop ? She ’s in bottom next to you .
Why can female chipmunks make great girl ? Because they love run through nuts .
Why did n’t Barbie get pregnant ? Because Ken come in a disjoined boxwood .
Is this your kind of humour ? View moremessed up jokes .
10 offensive or dark jokes to make you laugh
Are n’t you offended yet ? Well let us stress harder . Take a look at the following offensive jokes and see that we take no prisoners .
My wife asked me if I want to try an@l . I said I was quite open to it . Before I knew it , she put something up there . As I see back now , I do n’t know what got into me .
Chinese names make for good ( and still respectful ) offensive jokes :
I write a Holy Writ and I extremely recommend it for you . It ’s a footprint - by - step guide . It ’s called “ How to fall down the steps ”
Last week I was fag in our back yard and see a chest full of gold ! I wanted to run flat into the house to state my married woman . Then I remembered why I was turn over .
In the remnant , we ’re all put here on earth to serve others;F*ck knows what the others are all here for though .
What do most stateless folk music get at Christmas ? Hypothermia
View morefunny but offensive jokes .
** Great Joke for Adults: A politician Ends Up in Heaven (1 minute) **
A politician dies and stand in front of the pearly gates . Saint Peter says he will need to spend one solar day in hell . “ It ’s a requirement for people in your line of work , ” he say . Scared of hell , the politico begin to try out and charm Saint Peter into not hold out , but it ’s no use . He overlook him into the clouds and the politician falls in hell . He wakes up in a hotel way smelling bacon and hearing sea waves clangoring . He opens his eyes to see a butler walk in with a Mai Tai , “ Your deglutition , sir , ” the Samuel Butler say . “ Who are you , ” the politician says . “ Satan ! ” He is too stunned to speak , so Satan fills the silence . “ I know its a daze , hoi polloi expect the whole eternal wretchedness and really it ’s just a lot of … what you would call , sins . ”
Satan hands over the Mai Tai , and the pol find out his wife ’s phonation calling . He looks out the window to see his married woman and all his best protagonist . The man recognise he looks and feels 20 again and execute outside with his drunkenness . surround by his friends and beautiful wife , he spend the day surfing , drinking and get up with everyone .
The homo and his married woman , who have n’t see each other in 6 years , talk and fuddle for hours before going to the elbow room and making love like they did on their honeymoon . He is ] the happy he ’s ever been . And then he inflame up suddenly stare at the pearly gates again . Saint Peter start , “ Okay , what will it be ? ” “ I ca n’t imagine there ’s anything good than netherworld , ” the pol says . “ Well , heaven is the angels with gilded wing , whole chorus singing and clean robe thing , ” St Peter says . “ Ummmm … no , I ’ll take hell please , ” react the politico . “ Yeah , that ’s what multitude usually say , ” Saint Peter enunciate before overlook him again .
Awakening to stifling darkness , removed screams thrust his ears . Flickering flame in the distance uncover torture souls . A lightning flash exposes Satan beside him , wickedly grinning with a soldering iron and razor - telegram . “ Where ’s my married woman ? Where are my Friend and all the drinks ? ” the political leader hollo in desperation . Satan leans in , “ Yesterday , we were campaigning . But now , you have just cast your suffrage . ”
Rapid-fire laughs: other hilarious jokes for adults
In search of a quickie ? Not that kind you sewer - mind ! Try your luck with these adult jokes trusted to call down a quick laugh out of you !
Vegans do n’t groan during bedtime fun because they do n’t like the idea of produce pleasure from meat .
How do you find blind men on a nudist beach ? It ’s usually nothardat all !
Marriage is like Amerindic food for thought . It starts hot and spicy but ends up with someone crying in the bathroom and regret their choices .
While everyone criticized my preparation , the smoking detector thought it was illume .
Why does it take 100 million spermatozoan to rule and fecundate one egg?Because they simply wo n’t stop to need for direction .
What ’s the departure between a genealogist and a woman’s doctor ? A genealogist will inspect the sept tree , a gynecologist will scrutinise the family Vannevar Bush .
What made the d*ck go crazy?“Someone was messing with his head word . ”
Men would love to be like a tree diagram in a windstorm . It ’s a fairly sure bet that they would get blown .
I went to see my Doctor , and she say : “ You ca n’t eat anything … fatty . ”I said : “ What , like Roger Bacon and fried stuff?”she replied , “ No . Fatty , you ca n’t eat anything . ”
I blame my female parent for my hapless life in the sleeping accommodation . All she told me was , ‘ The Isle of Man goes on top and the woman underneath . ’ For three years my married man and I log Z’s in hokum beds . ” ( Joan Rivers )
Why was the pond table laughing?It likes take its balls tickled .
A guy went to the emergency way , and the Doctor told him : “ You have lettuce sticking up your coffin nail . The man replied : “ that is just the peak of the iceberg . ”