At one point or another , We ’ve all been guilty of watching those late - nighttime infomercials and feel slightly inclined to call the toll - barren act and purchase whatever miracle item it is they ’re sell . Sometimes the pitching is just too resistless . How can we say no to the super absorbency of the ShamWow ? Or the unrivaled stain - busting power of OxiClean ? Most of the clock time these products end up just collecting dust in our W.C. after we realize they do n’t seem to be quite as efficient or essential as their advertising made them out to be , however , sometimes a products exceeding level of ridiculousness is made painfully apparent right from the start — like with these 12 “ as project on TV ” point that sure constitute some of the worst branding and ware failure to ever be considered consumer “ trade good . ”
12. Sauna Pants
tons of gymnasium have sauna , therefore saunas must help you lose weight and get in shape , right ? Our guesswork is that was the gearing of thought that led to the invention of Sauna Pants . With Sauna Pants you could kiss your gram calorie counting day arrivederci because once you flog on a pair of these personalized crotch cookers , that unwanted free weight around your hips and thighs will supposedly just melt away — along with any fortune of having child , if you happen to be a hombre .
11. Pajama Jeans
As if Western society was n’t already slothful enough , Now you could forget the planetary house wearing the exact same clothes you went to layer in and no one will be the wiser . As stated in the infomercial , this groundbreaking merchandise is stark for absolutely any occasion whether you ’re head to the business office or just making a quick run to the food market store . Why ritual killing comforter for style when you may have it all with Pajama Jeans ? Just make indisputable you also piece up some khaki intimate apparel to go along with it .
10. My Secret Hair Enhancer
Here ’s a product that basically tries to slip by off nebuliser paint as a remedy for baldness . My Secret Hair Enhancer is essentially an aerosol can filled with hair’s-breadth - colored blusher that you’re able to use to cover those follicley dispute areas on your scalp between the clumps of cutting hair that still remains . But anyone with any usual sense should hump that spray paint only has two purposes — make street art and coating patio article of furniture . Nobody should even believe using My Secret Hair Enhancer unless they ’re inclined to receive a pot of cumbersome stare . Of of course , if you ’re really into that slick , shiny finish that only a can of nebuliser paint can achieve , then this is just what you ’ve been waiting for .
9. Neck Magic Air Cushion / DR. HO’s Neck Comforter
This one ’s a must have for anyone who ’s ever witness the tradition of neck stretching practiced in certain cultures and thought to themselves “ now that ’s for me . ” Both the Neck Magic Air Cushion and DR . HO ’s Neck Comforter use a pump to slowly increase the pressure in an inflatable underground around your neck , effectively pulling your capitulum away from your shoulders . They might see and sound like some form of medieval torment gadget , but the infomercials guarantee us the apparatus provide soothe muscle relaxation and even headache embossment . Plus you could finally achieve that elongated neck feeling that will make all you the envy of all your friends .
8. The Back Up
Do you hate home intruder almost as much as you detest common common sense gun base hit ? Then have we get the product for you . The Back Up is a handy gun for hire wrack that fits snugly between your bed mattress and box spring so you’re able to whip out your scattergun even while still in a lying position . block about mess up with the key fruit to get into your safe and good hitman vitrine , with the Back Up , you ’ll have your gun in handwriting and firing in less than the time it guide to turn on the lights and determine what you ’re shooting at . And at the improbably low-cost Mary Leontyne Price of $ 39.95 , you might as well get one for both sides of the bottom .
7. The Tiddy Bear
The Tiddy Bear is a blurry little teddy bear matter that bind to seat belts with and is designed to relieve pressure wherever you need it , as well prevent you from being hurt by a searing hot shoulder strap . As the ad would have you believe , behind belts can make it gruelling for some in particular well - empower woman to suspire . Rather than give rubber for comfort by not put on the knock at all , the Tiddy Bear provide an ingenious answer by slip right between those assets to allow long - lasting comfort whenever you ’re in the car . But let ’s confront it , the good part of this product is all in the name since we ’re clear supposed to be hearing the give-and-take “ Titty Bear ” whenever it ’s mention . We ’re pretty certain the selling squad was all high-pitched fives and ass slaps after coming up with that self-respecting double entendre .
6. Talking TP
Have you ever looked at your crapper paper dispenser and believe to yourself , “ would n’t it be heavy if I could also use this thing to record interpreter messages ? ” No ? Well that ’s likely just because you ’re a normal , reasonable person who thinks rationally . For anyone else with more questionable mental states , Talking TP could be the intersection you ’ve been waiting for . It ’s expectant for birthdays , weddings , Christmas , and office party . Just press a push button to register a message — something like , “ Susan , will you marry me ? Flush once for yes ” then posture back and permit the laughs ramble in . Of course to get the full effect , you ’d probably have to obliterate in the privy while mass do their business , but possibly that should n’t come as a surprisal deliberate we ’ve already establish that this product was clearly made with certifiably insane people in head .
5. The Better Marriage Blanket
block trust and communication , for one easy payment of $ 49.95 ( plus shipping and handling , of grade ) you may own the arcanum to a healthier , more loving marriage . That ’s good , the Better Marriage Blanket is a state - of the - art fart - absorbing bed canvas that helps ensure the problem of frequent flatulence never comes between you and your cooperator . use activated carbon copy material — the same character of fabric used by the military to protect against chemic weapons — this mantle was progress to withstand a full - scale mustard gaseous state attack so it should n’t have any job absorbing a few Dutch Ovens .
Do n’t get breaking wind break away your marriage vow , order the Better Marriage Blanket today !
4. Dump Meals
From the same mass who land you Dump Cakes now there ’s Dump Meals , because if there were any word that conjure up image of a mouth - watering sweetheart , surely it ’s “ dump . ” But not to worry , this product does n’t involve you cooking up faecal feasts , the brilliant brand name really refer to method by which the meals are prepared — by “ dumping ” ingredient into a crock pot .
This specialty cook al-Qur’an is stretch with tons of culinary secrets you wo n’t find anywhere else . Want to know how to prepare the perfect teriyaki chicken ? Just underprice in a can of peppiness ale . Ever had New York style rich dish pizza pie ? Well , just wait till you try a slice of slow cooked dump dish pizza pie . With Dump Meals you never have you let your in use docket get in the way of a delicious dinner .
3. Potty Putter
Potty Putter attempts to solve one of the greatest and most persistent of all the first world trouble : not having enough activities to do on the stool . Forget reading or look at the ingredients number on the back of your shampoo bottle , now you could wreak on shaving strokes off your putting game while you sit perched atop your porcelain throne . Although , considering that the club that comes included with the Potty Putter is n’t regulated for your height , and most people do n’t putt from a sitting position , the only thing its in all probability going to help you with is marking a lot of number two ’s on you grade sheet .
2. Uro Club
Okay , can someone please explain what the peck is with golfers conflate their summercater and the excretion of corporal fluid . The Uro Club is publicise as the “ only golf club that ’s secure to keep you out of the forest ” ( to relieve yourself ) . That ’s because inside it ’s hollow out handle is a “ discerning sanitary solution ” for all of your urinary demand . Just twist the Uro Club ’s grasp to reach the built - in reservoir , pose in your piffling caddy , and let it all out in good order there on the honey oil . The gadget come with a ready to hand clip - around - the - waist towel to gull class marshals into thinking you ’re just checking out your golf club ’s magnificent workmanship . It ’s by far the posh way to relieve yourself on the course while simultaneously understate interruptions so you could get in as many hole as possible . Just verify you take away it from your friend golf base if you chance to be borrowing a band of clubs . You would n’t want them to get pissed off — or , in this vitrine , make on .
1. The Slobstopper
The informercial for this product boast an embarrassing everyday place in which a world sit in his park railcar spills coffee on himself , induce an attractive female passer to frown . But then , on a later mean solar day , the same smooth individual once again spills coffee all over himself , only this sentence he ’s wearing a full - length adult bib , have the same attractive fair sex to smile instead . You see , the only reason she glower in disfavour the first time was because the man had gotten coffee stains on his shirt and trouser , not because he was a complete nitwit who looked like he did n’t eff the first matter about transferring liquids from a cup to his oral cavity . Although her approval upon seeing the elephantine bib could also just have in mind that she ’s got a really creepy baby fetish . In any case , if you incorporate the Slobstopper as part of your daily wardrobe you ’re certain to get a lot of added attending .
